Silencing Your Inner Mean Girl


We have those days, the days where we feel hopeless, we feel self conscious and like there’s no light at the end of the tunnel. And sometimes those days seems to drag into weeks, months, maybe even as long as a  year or two. We then pick ourselves up again just to be torn down by our inner critic. The girl who tells us we’re not good enough, we’re worthless, we’re not pretty enough, or not smart enough, the list goes on. How do we fight back against this voice so we can begin living our lives how we want to?

It’s a challenge, but it can be done. We first have to look deep in within ourselves and realize that we are enough. That we are perfect just the way we are. Look around you and see the people in your life. They love you, they support  you, they think you’re enough. So why do we second guess them? Why don’t we believe them when they say that we should never change?l

Our inner voice can be a powerful thing. It has the power to make us feel a certain way and for most of us, that voice makes us feel bad about ourselves. So how can we combat this?

I struggle with this myself, and I have found success in quieting my inner girl with a few strategies. So let’s dive in.

  • Practice Gratitude: By recognizing all of the things in your life that you are grateful for, helps to put things in perspective and helps you to realize that you actually have a lot of things in your life that are wonderful. I like to reflect on things I’m grateful for in the morning. It sets the tone for the rest of the day and puts me in a positive mind set. You can do this by simply meditating, writing in a gratitude journal, or even reciting the list of things your grateful for out loud.
  • Talk to yourself as you would to your best friend.  You wouldn’t tell your best friend that he/she is worthless, you wouldn’t tell her/him that their fat or ugly. Right? So why do we think it’s acceptable to talk to ourselves in this way? Whenever you catch yourself saying something negative, stop yourself and think if you would say that to your best friend. If  you wouldn’t, then turn that phrase into a positive realization.
  • Accept your imperfections: No one is perfect. It is our imperfections that make us unique and it is these imperfections that we should celebrate. If your shy, own it. Curvy? Own that, be proud of your hips. And so on.
  • Exercise: I feel my sexiest self and most confident self, right after I get done working out. Weird right? I’m sweaty, my hair is a mess, I smell, yet I feel confident because I just kicked the workouts ass. It makes me appreciate my body having completed a workout that was difficult. When I improve my mile time I feel like I can own the world. I feel like I’m in control and that anything is possible.
  • Talk it out: Sometimes all it takes to feel better is talking about your feelings with someone you truly trust. Whenever I’m feeling down or self conscious I always pull my husband aside and tell him what I’m struggling with. He talks me down and helps me realize that what my inner mean girl is telling me isn’t true, and he makes me feel like I’m enough.

So the next time your inner mean girl is taunting you, try implementing the above strategies. Remember that you are beautiful, your successful, your enough.


Photos taken by Alida Bigham. Check her out here. 

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